Plug This "Thangy" Into This "Thangy"

What is it even called?  Why didn't I learn all these technical names and words? Why does it have to be so complicated?  I just want to turn the switch and have it come on, push the button and have it appear, plug it in and have it work.  Why can't I just point to "that thang" and it will describe it all and everyone will understand what it is????  Alas, I think technology has passed me by and I can't catch up.  I have too few words left and even less gray matter to grasp it all, I can't even figure out which remote to use to turn on the dumb TV or the video or the VCR "thang".

I was reminded of this a few days ago when I was in Fredricksburg at mom's house.  We were enjoying a technology free day when little sister Janet called on my cell and wanted to know why mother's phone wasn't working.  Our sweet little mom has several phones laying around, when you're 94 you can have whatever laying around that you want, and usually has one  phone in her pocket.  Perhaps, me thinks, they've been left off the "thangy" and the battery is dead.  So I venture over and start collecting phones seeing if there are any dial tones.  Nada, nothing, not happning.  I look at it, nothing, push a button, nothing, look at it again, nothing, push a button, nothing,  look at it again, still nothing. Then go pick up another extension and repeat the same.  Still nothing.  That's it, that's the extent of my knowledge.  I thought about going outside and yelling for any child to come help because they usually know more than I do.  But I didn't want to look like the crazy old woman that yells at kids from her front steps.  Where are my nephews when I need them? Mom's telephone is her best friend so I didn't want to alarm her but I had to ask who her phone carrier was so perhaps they could help.  So when we figured out who had her "bundle", ( TV, internet, phone, plumbing, electricity, water ), just kidding,  I called them hoping that they would just say, "oh, yes,honey,  you just hang up that sweet phone and I'll push this button and your phone will be back on and ready to go and you won't have to do anything."  Not the case.  As I began my wary approach into mom's room where I knew all the phone lines and emergency " help I've fallen and can't get up" line and computer lines are all found, I start hearing the music from the movie Jaws in my head. Can you hear it? Dun dun.  Dun dun.   Dun dun  Dundundundundundundun.....
A slow dread began ascending on me,  I knew what was waiting for me under the bed. Dundundundun 

"Don't be afraid of the enemy !  Remember the Lord, who is great and glorious"  Nehemiah 4:14

 

 

 

 

 

 I can't even begin to tell you the conversation that followed.  I have blocked it out of my mind.  All I remember is I knew I was in trouble when the phone lady  started using terms like................well I can't even come up with the words she was using, but they were all those plug in "thangs".  She had to explain which black box I was having to look at and which plugs should be plugged where. 

Why so many different kinds of plugs?

At one point I had to say, ok, nice helper, this plug looks like a "thang" that I would plug into the wall if it were a lamp plug, is that what you mean?  I'm sure she was rolling her eyes.  Mom was right there assisting me with the whole experience.  At one point, I was hearing in one ear, " Ok, Mrs. Chesser, unplug blah blah and then plug the blah blah blah blah blah".  In the other ear I was hearing " Tell her that I am 94 and can not be without my phone because if something happened to me I would need to call someone to come and help me".  And then right in the middle of that blessing, my body started heating up from the inside out and an oh so sweet hot flash ripped through my body. Dun  dun  dun  dun  dun  dun     Dundundundundundundundun  

Good news is, I was able to change around a couple of phones so that they would work until a technician could get there to help us fix our "thangs".

AND ALL GOD'S PEOPLE SAID AMEN.

Keep laughing, laughter is good medicine.